She ain't pretty.

I'm...

Friday, May 30, 2008 11:00 PM

Stress

Depress

Restless

Bored

Confused

Swarmed...

by so many things I think my head is gonna burst anytime.

I'm tired, clueless..so help me...anyone!

The Final Straw

10:23 PM

I am no longer motivated to do my very best at work. Things have been hard and I am getting restless. About ten months ago, things were going on pretty good and we rarely had gossiping or whispering sessions. Everyone was kinda happy and we were all not afraid to say how we feel out loud (out loud refers to ‘non-whispering’ conversations).

First she (A) protects her (B), the woman we all have grown to dislike ever since…I can’t remember when. It all started when B gave a resignation letter to A and A gave it back to B saying that she is not going to accept it. We were all brewing in excitement after we heard rumours of B wanting to resign because she can’t cope with the responsibilities. We were then distraught when A gave B back the letter. So we are still having to deal with B whether we like it or not.

Why we dislike B:
She doesn’t co-operate.
She says she is busy when she is not (she was playing computer games and say she’s busy)
She tai-chi everything (means if that’s not her job and it’s yours she will push it to you, she doesn’t help. She draws a definite line when it comes to work)
She refuse to cover reception during lunch time saying that since she has to over-ride, she shouldn’t be doing reception too (she said either or, not both)

We sent out an email to A by giving subtle comments on our unhappiness but nothing was done. She said I will be covering reception because she wouldn’t want B to do that because B is busy with lots of things. And I have to add that A said that I’m usually pretty free! That got me goin nuts! First of all, I am not free. I just happen to have the skill to make time for everything to be done on time.

We were all coping with the fact that there are no chances of her leaving then the final straw came.

We recently found out that B was nominated by A for the CEO GEM (Go the Extra Mile) Award. I told one of the RM and her reaction was “Got meh? She always tai-chi everything.”

We were all starting to think whether any threats or statements have been issued from B to A to stop her from leaving us.

I have been here for 20 months. I work really hard to make sure customers are served well and I have had two feedbacks given by customers about me to A. But still, B gets the nomination.

I remembered late last year when I was told by A that I’ve made huge progress in my work and she and boss likes my attitude. She also mentions that I should prepare myself for greater responsibilities coz she and boss were sure that once I get my degree, I wouldn’t just want to be an RO. Does this mean I’m getting a promotion anytime this year?

For all the things that has happened I am ready to move on…out. There is no way for me to move up the ladder if I stay here. I may but it’s prolly gonna take 10 years to finally do so. So I should say bye-bye soon!

Pictures Galore

Sunday, May 25, 2008 10:25 PM

On Wednesday, 21st May, a few of my colleagues, namely, Joan, Huang Xiao, Angie and Joseph together with me had dinner at Breeks at Marina Square. We had so much fun away from work and the stress of it all. We were talking and laughing so much I would just smile thinking about it. The fun part came when we decided to have Massive Attack for dessert!

Here's a more vivid idea of what I meant by fun:

When the waitress put in on the table and she started to place dessert spoons and straws for each of us, Joseph started asking why we were given straws. Turns out that at the bottom of this huge goblet is something like milkshake. She said that this serves 3-5 people..perfecto!

View from the top...

Yummy yummy.

I had to agree with Angie when she said "Price not so expensive...plus good company, makes it all very satisfying".

I dunno about their food but my food wasn't really good but the company I had makes it all loads better!

So yesterday on the last minute I decided to go for the Robinsons sales at Expo Hall 7 and saw this perfume by Britney Spears, which I had been eyeing on for quite a while.

I also thought of getting Midnight Fantasy by Britney Spears but Effa stopped me, which is a good thing.

Next I have a picture taken out of the ordinary coz Wendy and I were wearing the same shoes! Only her's was rounded mine was pointed. I saw her wearing this shoe and asked her where she bought it. The next day I headed to URS to get a pair.

Next is the video of Izz Zuhairi. I edited this video when I got bored waiting for Yanping a few weeks ago.

Time 100 Most Influential People in The World

Saturday, May 24, 2008 10:46 PM

Leaders & Revolutionaries
Dalai Lama
Vladimir Putin
Barack Obama
Hillary Clinton
John McCain
Jacob Zuma
Anwar Ibrahim
Kevin Rudd
Hu Jintao
George W Bush
Bartholomew I
Ben Bernanke
Muqtada Al-Sadr
Robert Gates
Michelle Bachelet
Sonia Gandhi
Baitullah Mehsud
Evo Morales
Ma Ying-jeou
Ashfaq Kayani

Heroes & Pioneers
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
Oprah Winfrey
Oscar Pistorius
Mia Farrow
Andre Agassi
Lance Armstrong
Bob and Suzanne Wright
Peter Gabriel
Kaka
Sheik Mohammed al-Maktoum
Yoani Sanchez
Madeeha Hsan Odhaib
Randy Pausch
Lorena Ochoa
Tony Blair
Alexis Sunduhije
Aung Suu Kyi
George Mitchell

Scientists & Thinkers
Michael Bloomberg
J. Craig Venter
Jill Bolte Taylor
Larry Brilliant
Nancy Brinker
Harold McGee
Peter Provonost
Jeff Han
Memmet Oz
Eric Chivian and Richard Cizik
Mary Lou Jepsen
Paul Allen
Nicholas Schiff
Mark Zuckerberg
Wendy Kopp
Shinya Yamanaka and James Thomson
Michael Griffin
Susan Solomon
Isaac Berzin

Artists & Entertainers
Lorne Michaels
Miley Cyrus
Robert Downey Jr.
Herbie Hancock
Joel and Ethan Coen
Peter Gelb
Mariah Carey
Khaled Hosseini
Elizabeth Gilbert
Rem Koolhaas
George Clooney
Tim Russert
Takashi Murakami
Suze Orman
Stephanie Meyer
Tyle Perry
Judd Apatow
Alex Rigopulos and Eran Egozy
Tom Stoppard
Chris Rock
Bruce Springsteen

Builders & Titans
Indra Nooyi
Steve Jobs
Radiohead
John Chambers
Jeff Bezos
Jay Adelson
Ali al-Naimi
Rupert Murdoch
Neelie Kroes
Prince Alwaleed bin Talal
Lou Jiwei
Jeffrey Immelt
Karl Lagerfield
Llyod Blankfein
Carlos Slim
Mo Ibrahim
Ratan Tata
Cynthia Carroll
Steve Ballmer
Jamie Dimon
Carine Roitfeld
Michael Arrington

Actors, a Facebook Creator, Visionaries, presidents, prime ministers, sportsmen, singers...they are all here!

You said I looked pretty...thank you.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008 11:14 PM

I was anticipating for an email from Christopher in regards to our finalised exam results and when I checked my email today to see one from him my heart started t beat so furiously I could literally feel it. BUT...it wasn't the result. It was instead an email telling us that he is leaving APMI and that some lady is our new program manager.

Thankfully our Winnie the Pooh only decided to leave after we have finished everything! Phew!

I have some pictures of lil Izz Zuhairi. Gosh I love that little guy!

This is the first picture. The flash disturbed him and he couldn't opened his eyes.

This is the second one which is much better coz i off the flash from the camera. He's so adorable.

He is an ice-cream lover. I was at home one day and he was in the kitchen with me. I took out a tub of Swensen's ice-cream from the freezer and made my way to my room and found that he was right behind me...begging for some!

Love it when he smiles! I have a video of him but I forgotten to upload it. Maybe next time.

P. Ramlee the Musical

Monday, May 19, 2008 8:50 PM

Atiqa had expressed her interest in the P. Ramlee Musical. She said that if it ever comes to Singapore she wants to catch it. So when I saw it on TV and the papers about their four show in three days, in Singapore, I ringed up Atiqa and asked her when she would like to go.

I was glad I managed to get quite good seats. We were four rows from the front and I could basically run towards the stage and touch the actors/actresses. I was also glad I took the oportunity to catch the musical. I didn't get to watch PGL the Musical so I know I have to see this one.

It's about the greatest seniman in the history of the Malay film industry...about his life, his inspiration and his music. I think I might have just had a teeny weeny little crush on the late P. Ramlee.

Musly, the actor who plays P. Ramlee, played the character really well and he looked so much like P. Ramlee, it just made it more believable. P. Ramlee was charasmatic and he had girls going really crazy for him, it's really unbelievable what these girls do to get his attention.

After the show they have an autograph session. Although it was 1130PM I was not going to miss this chance.

Musly Ramlee as P.Ramlee

Liza Hanim as Saloma

Melissa Saila as Norizan

Atilia as Junaidah

I really won't mind catching it again!

Carousel

8:46 PM

I met up with Yanping yesterday to go for our long awaited trip to Carousel for hi-tea. But before we did that we watched Made of Honour at Cathay Cineleisure. It was a very nice movie with a happy ending...but happy ending only ends up in movies, not in real life. I might have just teared up a few times.

So we had our hi-tea at Carousel and the ambience was nice. Peaceful and I really ate a lot!

Dim Sum...

Sushi...

Cakes...

Pudding...which was really sweet!

This was on Yanping's plate, not mine.

I was quite obsessed with...

the glass, and...

the salt and pepper shaker.

The Batam Trip

8:29 PM

Day One

I arrived at Harbourfront at about 830AM and I still couldn'y get Yanping. She must have overslept. Received her call I think about 10AM and met up with Lindy and Jaye. We were scheduled for the ferry departing at 12PM. I was sleepy however I couldn't wait to reach there and get the day to start.

Yanping and I fell asleep on the ferry and it was a nice nap. We reached the Batam terminal at 1PM Singapore time. I was feeling hungry and as soon as we reached the hotel we girls had to get food in our stomach. A bunch of hungry girls don't make good company coz we are all groggy. We had to settle with eating at the cafe in the hotel.

Yanping's

Lindy's

Jaye's and mine.

After lunch, we slack in teh room for a while and made our way to the Tree Tea Spa to make our apa accpointments. We had about two hours prior to the spa so we head out of the hotel to explore.

We got someone to drive us down to the beach. I saw someone doing parasailing out at sea and we all thought that we should do so the next day. We then went back to the Holiday Inn resort and the gals headed to the jacuzzi before the spa treatment and I lay down on the sofa in my room to nurse a stomach ache.

We can only take pictures of the spa place from outside so this is what I could get

All for of us had an aromatheraphy massage and rose milk bath and it made me feel totally good after that. So refreshed and I was getting sleepy. But we had to get dinner. People have been recommending for us to go to a seafood place near the hotel so we headed there and had chilli crab. It was my first time cracking the shell of the crab to retrieve the juicy meat behind it.

After an hour and we had our stomach filled, we went back to the hotel and Yanping and I indulge ourselves to four hours of TV before we decided to knock off.

Day 2
We woke up and the first thing we did before breakfast was swim. Lindy and Jaye had a much better room. The balcony leads to the swimming pool!

We had breakfast by the pool...

...and took some pictures before we go for our watersports.

We went for our parasailing, jet-skiing and banana boat ride. It was a mistake not bringing my camera along for the trip. Such a waste. It was really fun especially the parasailig. I have been wanting to do that but I couldn't get the chance when I went to Penang and Phuket.

It was all a rush and we took the ferry back to Singapore at 430PM Batam time. In al the tiredness, we manage to take some pictures in the ferry.

Huh?

Saturday, May 17, 2008 9:27 AM

I think I could just fall asleep right now. Attending to customers at the state that I am in is just not appealing. I slept at 2AM after watching the Survivor Finale and had only four hours of sleep. I can hardly wait for 1130 to arrive. I didn't take a nap in the train on the way to work, I read CLEO instead and I wished I had taken a short nap. I hope my head won't spin!

I know I said that I will try to post the pictures from last weekend's trip to Batam by end of this week and I still got tomorrow. But i'll try to do it today. I just have to shake all the unneccessary laziness away and it will all be up.

So the Davids are in the finals. I have a feeling that Archuleta is going to win however if he does, Cook is going to do better. I like David Cook. His voice is the bomb! Gosh I'm no good at using Randy's language.

I'm so excited for tomorrow. I got things plan and I will be out almost the whole day!!! Meeting Yanping at 1PM to watch Made of Honours (Male version of My Best Friend's Wedding, weather Patrick Dempsey's character is gonna end up with the best friend I don't know). Then we gonna have hi-tea at Carousel which I'm so excited about! Yanping and I gonna go chi-chi!!! We wanted to go watch What Happens in Vegas but I already have plans with Atiqa. Some other time gal, I promise. But you can go get Darren to accompany you (if he wants lah).

Thereafter I'm meeting Atiqa for the P Ramlee musical. She told me that if it comes to Singapore she wants to watch it so I asked her as soon as I saw it on the papers. It's gonna be a two hours show which I find quite long.

Then Monday is a public holiday and I kinda forgotten about it and was actually thinking of how I'm gonna dread Monday coz I will be out till late on Sunday. Mum, dad and me are gonna prolly catch Ayat-Ayat Cinta and Cathay's new cineplex at Downtowan East.

Movies and galore...here I come!

I think you're uber hot!

Friday, May 16, 2008 1:36 PM

I couldn't help it. I always have been telling myself "No Fadhilah, no!" And I just couldn't.

One fine evenning I was with my colleagues sitting in the Rock Auditorium, waiting for the roadshow to start. The row in front of us were the people from branch. I looked left and right and didn't find him. But a few minutes before they dimmed the lights, he walked in all fresh and smart, wearing a casual black polo tee. I think my feet started to melt. As if that's not enough, he chose to sit right in front of me and I got a sniff of his cologne...my legs started to melt.

So I SMS Yanping and told her about it. I couldn't bloody help it...why does he always make me feel this way. I couldn't stop looking at him that night even if it was the back of his head. I wish it could just bugger off...well honestly I didn't wish for that.

I wanna smack his butt sometimes, I think it's super cute!

OMG!!! What am I saying all these things???

Someone's gotta save me from this or I will probably drown in my own wax!

I've Fallen

Tuesday, May 13, 2008 4:19 PM

I need a serious form of inspiration. Life is getting boring. There is nothing to talk about….well there are and I need a muse so that I will have the motivation and good flow of words to write it on paper. Maybe it will flow if I believe or at least try to believe that I can do it if I just concentrate hard and let it flow from my heart and my brain and into the piece of paper. Let my fingers rapidly do the typing and everything will be fine.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately, well not really…but I was thinking…about lots of things. I think about my job, my life and my future. I think about what God have planned for me and whether I have the strength to receive it with open arms. I wished I could say that I am prepared to do so but I don’t have that confident I desire. Whatever that has been happening in my life were mostly unplanned for I’m sure. I would love for things to be spontaneous but it never turns out the way I wanted, at least half of ‘em. But I guess I should be learning to accept. By saying that things ‘never’ go my way is an overstatement. Sometimes things does go my way.

You know how sometimes you know that doing something that will be bad for you or something that you should not get involved in but you just don’t care and then you fall into it? Does this make any sense? Because I know that I should have stayed away from something but I choose to ignore any warnings and then I crash ahead and fall.

I am in serious need for someone to pick me up and teach me how to walk...along the straight line.

You put me on Cloud Nine..

Monday, May 12, 2008 9:28 PM

You always do that...and I couldn't help falling for it...why am I so attracted to you? I couldn;t ignore you, I found myself finding for you first thing in the morning, just wanting to get a glimpse. This is quite bad...I will not fall deep. I will not allow myself to feel that way.

Anyway I got back from my Batam trip with Yanping, Jaye and Lindy. We stayed at the Holiday Inn resort which was quite satisfying. It was so much fun but I am too lazy to post the pics at the moment. We went parasailing, jetskiing and banana boat-ing. It's tood bad I don't have the pics. However there is gonna be a next time insyallah. I would love to go again. I also had aromatheraphy massage and a milk bath. Super relaxing. I shoudl go for massages more ofen to soften my super hard shoulders and neck.

I'll try to post pics by end of this week...promise...

Oh my---

Friday, May 09, 2008 8:48 PM

Well it seems or I should have more time once I am done with my degree. I don't have to go for classes or prepare my assignments. But classes are what I looked forward to at the end of a tiring day at work. I can't really explain why.

So i got an early graduation present from David, like he had promised. I saw this bag designed by Betsy Johnson for her collection Betseyville.

Then I actually asked David to get me this other bag because he said anything below $500. And the bag from Betseyville is half that. I couldn't wait any longer so I wen ahead to buy this bag after I left office for my half day. It's from an American designer, Kathy van Zeeland. Her bags are so trendy and up-to-date. I shall not post the price here.

Do a star jump!!!!!

Saturday, May 03, 2008 11:18 PM

I finally did it! I'm done with exams...like wow! I am finally free. Freedom now belongs to me!!!!!

I've been waiting for this moment for quite a while and now that it is here I wished I could celebrate with Aiyun and Andin but I rushed home instead because I have not done my solat yet. Exams ended in a not so sweet note because paper was tough. It wasn't as breezy as last week but it wasn't that tough either. It felt like econs all over again and I hate it. I can't wait for results and more importantly my convocation! I am so excited I can't barely sit. (OK i'm overeacting)

What a bummer that I have to go back to work on Monday!

I got pics to post...so here it goes:

Photos taken during the Sunday makan outing

Dearest mum and dad.

Taking a bite!

Daddy's girls

Effa and moi

We were trying to do an illusion but it was quite unsuccessful.

I realise we have no pics of dearest granny....well moving on!

My bunch of crazy colleagues and me. The theme for this year's service staff nite was 'Balik Kampung' which explains all the batik sarong, baju kurung and pyjamas wear. My colleagues were so on they decided to put curlers in their head. The only guy in the picture is Bryan...the cicak.

That's it for tonight. I'll celebrate my last paper victory by sleeping! Mum and I are going to Wayan Retreat tomorrow for some spa treatment...my treat for her for Mother's Day.